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  • Writer's pictureemelsaat28

Bored Blog 32: Feeling Bummed Out With Where You Are in Life?

3/17/2022


Hey guys, spring is almost here!


For the entrepreneurs out there, what do you do after you finish a project? I'm not sure about you but before I find my next project, I spend some time feeling lost. And no, this is not on purpose. It's just a good ol' time to feel unsure about life, where you're going in it and if you're heading in the right direction. Maybe you've felt like this after each project, book, piece of art, song, film, or job you've done.


I'm not the first to say this-life is an endless journey of figuring out the next step you're going to take.



After posting the documentary Broken up on Youtube and putting up the last video (for now) on Tiny Homes NYC, I had nothing else to do. Though...I do have some writing pieces I need to finish, but it's all so daunting just thinking about it. Also, no one is really waiting on it so, I can finish it whenever (but that kind of thinking is not helping me is it?).


I told myself to take a week off. Which left me bored because there was nothing to watch on YouTube or Netflix. With a whole lot of thinking and some help from my bro, I am going to work on my own YouTube channel. We'll see how that goes. It's going to focus on stories in any medium - anime, manga, movies, books, tv shows, comics, writing or anything to do with stories. Wish me luck!


Besides that, yesterday a friend from high school contacted me. He said he's back in NY and wants to meet up. I was happy for a bit because it's been a while since I've seen him. But then again it's like those feelings you get at a high school reunion. You reflect on yourself and feel like you haven't accomplished much. You're still living at your parents' place, no one is into hiring you, you're not in any romantic relationship, you have no kids, it's been 4 more years and you're still not fluent in that language you said you're studying, and your fashion style has upgraded by 3% since you last saw your old friend (because you still have a bunch of stuff from high school/college. If it fits why throw it away?).


While my friend has been able to move out to California on his own right after college, got a pretty cool job, lives in a nice city, he gets to ride his bike to work, has cool co-workers and he can travel into NYC more than once a year. He's pretty well put together. He spends his Sundays cleaning his whole apartment! The only things I clean are my dishes, myself, the kitty litter and the bathtub. I need to step it up.


I've been running the possible conversations we'll have in my head over and over. Making myself pretty sad with who I haven't become yet. There's so much more growing I need to do.


You know what? When I meet him this weekend I'm going to show up in my most embarrassing sweater. I'm going to show up and say, "Yes, this is the type of people you hang out with!"



If it's not too cold that day, then yes. Here we go. My friend better watch out! And he better feel embarrassed.


Let's forget about him for a second. At times like this I need to tell myself that I am a flower. What kind of flower? Who knows? But I am a flower that's going to bloom at some point and when that day happens it's either going to be awesome or I'm going to be too busy planning my next move to notice. And that's how it will be for you too. Don't worry.


Now, if you're feeling bummed out with where you are right now in life, never leave the conversation in your head on a bad note. You can't control everything, but one of the few things you can control are your thoughts.


I say, right now is the perfect time to do it. Take a moment to do a little dance or close your eyes as you listen to this song. You have to listen to the whole thing or you'll be missing out. Imagine yourself with all of the people you love to be around, on a huuuuuge grassy field, having a blast at this big picnic. You're all enjoying the here and now.




Talk to you laters,

Emel



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